Mum burnout, what is it, and how can you overcome it?

Last Updated on September 1, 2024

Do you ever feel like no matter what you do, you just can’t seem to get on top of everything, and that if one more thing is added to your to do list you may just explode? If so, you may be feeling mum burnout.

There’s absolutely no reason to feel guilty about feeling burnout as a mum, it’s something all mums will feel at some point, and may even feel multiple times.

Luckily, there are ways to overcome mum burnout, which this blog post will cover.

But first, what is mum burnout, and what are the symptoms?

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What is mum burnout?

Mum burnout, or motherhood burnout, is when you feel mentally, physically, or emotionally depleted, so much so, that you can’t give any more of these things to anyone, yourself included.

Mum burnout symptoms

Symptoms of mum burnout are different for different mums, and you may experience a symptom of burnout that you won’t experience again if you feel burnout more than once.

Some of the symptoms of motherhood burnout are:

• Feeling mentally, physically, or emotionally exhausted
• Becoming short tempered, or getting angry easily
• Lack of interest in things you love
• Trouble sleeping
• Changes in appetite
• Not wanting to spend time with others
• Feeling mum guilt towards your behaviour, reactions, thoughts, or feelings
• Feeling fed up with motherhood
• Feeling like you’re not a good mum, or as good as you used to be
• Worrying about things that haven’t happened
• Experiencing extreme highs and lows
• Feeling like you need a break
• Resistance towards adding anything new to your to do list
• Waking up feeling as though you don’t want to face the day
• Feeling resentful towards your partner, kids, or the world in general

A good way to keep track of burnout symptoms, and to see when they’re at their worst, is to record them in a habit tracker, so you get a good idea of how your symptoms progress overtime, and when you may need to take a well deserved break.

How to prevent mum burnout

Once you’ve noticed that you’re feeling any of the above mum burnout symptoms, here are some things you can do to overcome it:

Let your kids play on their own

Feeling overwhelmed as a mum can happen when we’re helping our kids with something they can do on their own.

For example, often I feel guilty if my kids are playing on their own, so I’ll stop what I’m doing and ask if they need help, or want something.

They will always say they do need help or something, even if they really don’t, so it means I have to stop doing what I was doing and meet their needs that really don’t need meeting during this time.

Letting your kids play on their own, or teaching your kids to be more independent, means that they’ll find ways to work problems out, which not only helps them in adulthood, but lessens the pressure you face as a mum, which ultimately helps to prevent mum burnout from happening.

Ask for help

One of the hardest things for mums to do is ask for help, but doing so goes a long way towards preventing motherhood burnout.

Help can come from a variety of sources, whether it’s a partner, family, friends, or using a babysitter, asking for help, or delegating things that you can’t do, or don’t have time to do, goes a long way towards dealing with the signs of burnout.

Be less critical of yourself

Being hard on yourself, or criticising yourself for things that you think you should be doing, or that you think you’re not doing, can contribute towards feeling overwhelmed as a mum.

Having self-compassion, and speaking to yourself kindly, are great ways to counteract feelings and thoughts of criticism, as does remembering that we will have off days in our motherhood journey.

Schedule self-care and alone time

Self-care for mums, and or having alone time isn’t selfish, it’s essential for negating feelings of criticism, and improving your physical and mental health.

Making time for self-care and alone time, helps you to have a life outside of motherhood, as well as helping you with feelings of overwhelm, as it gives you some much needed time to recharge your batteries, and get back to being the mum you want to be.

It’s also worth remembering that self-care doesn’t have to be extravagant, small self-care activities that you can do daily such as taking a moment to breath, watching your favourite TV show, or talking to a friend, can make you feel more balanced, and happier.

Talk to someone

Having mum friends, family members, a partner, or a professional that you can talk to about how you’re feeling, can go a long way towards working on ways to overcome mum burnout, and lessen any guilt you feel about it.

Say no

Saying yes to everything, and overscheduling yourself and your children is a way to burnout fast.

Before saying yes to anything, ask yourself if you really want to do it, and if you have time to do it, and if the answer is no to either of these, say no.

Let go of perfection

Letting go of perfection, or the idea of what perfection is, can help to avoid feelings of overwhelm.

An example of letting go of perfection includes finishing household chores when they’re at a level of good enough, so you have more time for the things you love.

Seek help

If after two weeks you still feel burnout as a mum, and nothing you do seems to make you feel better, it may be time to seek help from a healthcare professional, who can work with you to get you back to feeling like yourself again.

Mum burnout

Mum burnout is something that many mums will go through, with some symptoms including feeling mentally, physically, or emotionally exhausted, trouble sleeping, lack of interest in things you enjoy, or feeling fed up with motherhood.

Being aware of the signs of burnout can help you to make changes to overcome it, or prevent it from returning.

Some of the ways you can overcome burnout if you feel overwhelmed as a mum include:

• Encouraging independence in your children
• Asking for help from others
• Having self-compassion, and speaking to yourself kindly
• Making time for self-care and alone time, which includes doing small daily activities that make you feel good
• Talking to friends, family, your partner, or a professional about your feelings
• Saying no to things you don’t want to do, or don’t have time to do
• Letting go of perfection by completing things to a standard that’s good enough
• Seeking help if you’ve been feeling burnt out for longer than 2 weeks, and nothing you do seems to help

Have you had mum burnout, and what helped you to get through it?

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