10 things I’ve learnt since becoming a mum

Last Updated on April 15, 2024

There are many things I’ve learnt since becoming a mum, which extend beyond what’s needed to keep another human alive, and which at times have been hard lessons to learn.

Here are 10 things I’ve learnt since becoming a mum, which I hope you can relate to if you’re also a mum, or alleviates any concerns or feelings you may have about becoming a mum for the first time, becoming a mum for the second time, or any stage of motherhood you’re in.

I’ve had to drop my standards

One of the hardest things I’ve learnt since becoming a mum is that I’ve have to drop my standards of cleanliness in my home.

I’m someone who gets irritated when my home’s a mess, my brain malfunctions at the sight of clutter, and having small children means that at any time there are many messes surrounding me.

I’ve had to learn and accept that the state of my home isn’t solely in my control, and that when the kids are finally in bed I can get it to the state that keeps me sane.

Always carry wet wipes

Where there are kids, there are sticky fingers that make a mess of everything.

Carrying wet wipes at all times means that you can tackle the mess before it gets on things that you don’t want messed up.

Always carry snacks

Like carrying wet wipes, you should always carry snacks because doing so quickly settles a hungry child, but it also gives you something to bribe your child with if needed.

I can function on little sleep

It’s not just newborns that wake at night, toddlers may go to bed late, and even preschoolers randomly wake in the middle of the night, which equals broken, or little sleep for us mums well past the newborn stage.

In my four years of being a mum, I’ve discovered that I can function on little sleep much better than I ever thought I could, which will help me when my boys are older, and I’m still missing sleep due to worrying about their whereabouts.

Do what works for you and your family

One of the best things I’ve learnt since becoming a mum, and something I remind myself of often, is to do what works for you and your family.

As a mum there’s lots of pressure to do things a certain way, to compare what we do to others, or even have strangers telling us to do things their way, but every family is different.

We all have different lifestyles and parenting styles, and we should only do what works for us and for our family, not someone else.

You’ll be judged and so will your kids

As a mum you’ll always feel judged.

You’ll feel like people are questioning your parenting choices, like how you introduce solids to your baby, what time your kids go to bed, and many other things.

Then when your child starts school there’s still judgement for things like how much screen time your kid has, what colour phonics book they’re on, whether you do or don’t do homework.

This is where the lesson about doing what’s right for you and your family comes in. Only you know what’s right for you and your family, only you know what decisions to make, and no one should judge you for it.

All kids are different

All kids and all siblings are different.

They have different personalities, reach milestones at different ages, and respond to their environment differently.

This means what works for one kid may not work for the other, and as a mum this has meant that I’ve had to parent my boys in ways that suit their individual personalities.

The days are long but the years are short

This is something I read about before becoming a mum, and now that I am one it makes perfect sense.

There are some days that start so early that I feel like a whole day has passed before 9am.

Then there are other days that are so repetitive that they drag on and on, and feel like they’re never going to end.

When your kids are small the days do drag on, but then all of a sudden it’s the end of the week, end of the year, and before you know it your kids are at school and you wonder where did time go?

I crave alone time, more than ever

I’ve always needed alone time, it’s how I recharge, and how I stay sane.

Being a mum means you get very little alone time, there’s always someone demanding something of you, you don’t even get to go to the bathroom alone.

Now that I don’t get much alone time I crave it more than ever, and it’s something that I’ve had to learn to make a priority, because without it I can be very hard to live with.

Plans aren’t set in stone

Another one of the hardest things I’ve learnt since becoming a mum is that plans often don’t happen, which I find hard because I really, really like a plan.

Your days and your time isn’t solely yours once you become a mum, which means you don’t have enough time to work on your to do list, catch up with work or anything else you need to do, making you feel unproductive at the end of the day.

To combat this I’ve had to learn to be satisfied with what I’ve been able to get done on any given day, and hope that the next day is better.

What’s something that you’ve learnt lately about motherhood?